the orange line

i got proposed to on the subway yesterday evening…………….
i kind of knew what our conversation was leading up to… he just kept asking me question about myself. i didn’t answer them very specifically, i know better now, and i was giving him short, closed answers. he was nice and everything but,
he needed a green card.
it was extremely awkward because we were sitting in front of one another for many, MANY stops. so it’s not like i could escape…
i felt bad when it was finally my turn to get off… i kind of just said it was nice meeting him and ran off the train.

when i got off, i asked a stranger where a park was that i needed to get to, and he told me he would walk me there. his name was Steve and he was a lot less creepy than the last guy, so i took his offer and together we walked. i found out a lot about him, and i guess in turn he found out general things about me. he was so friendly! we were both in a rush and he made the fast-paced walk a lot less boring.

i have a serious problem with talking to strangers. i thought i was getting better about it…
i have a real problem leading guys on, too :/ i can’t help my charm. KIDDING. but i’m just not mean enough.

i’m not telling this story to seem cocky, but i just needed to vent about it and remind people that GUYS ARE CREEEEPS (they don’t know any better, is my excuse for their behavior). i have many more stories that you probably don’t want to hear. even others that involve public transportation.. but there are some good ‘mates’ out there. so don’t give up. but don’t pursue impossible, either.

check out this website, Scars and Smiles which is the exhibit i visited last night. it was beautiful.

ya’ll are going to be getting a LOT more posts from me now that i’m avoiding social networking sites…

so I’ve started filming for a music video (just as a practice project). it’s going terribly! my actors (my brothers) are STUBBORN. i can’t really blame them since i’m forcing them to become these characters for me when it’s the last thing they want to do, but DAMN! can a sista catch a break?! literally. and my sister is supposed to be in it, too, but she doesn’t live with us anymore! scheduling is shitty. and i want to have this video done before Ramadan starts because things slow down and i have to go back to school to complete one last year of something i’m not motivated to complete… 😥 and i won’t have my sister’s dslr, and i’ll have to borrow one from a friend or something… i hate asking for favors so i probably won’t… and i’ll be busy focusing on my job and academics.
i get so excited about my ideas for short films.. it’s so weird. it’s like that feeling you get when you’re about to get on a roller coaster or see your crush. those butterflies. and my butterflies are dying because of how hard this project is becoming.
i’ve gotta keep my chin up. where are all the willing actors?? and once again — if anyone has the recipe for time… i’ll gladly take it.

i’m full of complaints tonight. i hate that.

xx

3 thoughts on “the orange line

  1. Really interesting post. I've always had this habit (sometimes problem!) of meeting strangers and I've met my fair share of creeps this way. I think I'm way too trusting. I guess it's just about trying to strike that balance of being yourself and being open and friendly and being a bit cautious xx

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  2. I definitely agree, Sy!!! 🙂

    Nick, I've always loved making silly movies with friends, and I find that it's the thing that makes me most happy. I love helping people, which was why I got into Social Work.. and I think that if I'm successful in film, I can motivate young people to follow their dreams and still volunteer my extra time to those in need.

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